I and, I think many people, have a pathological need for people to like me. Partially, I think because my natural instinct is to assume that no one on earth likes me and it’s a miracle when people do. I try, really hard. However, I also am attempting to be a working professional. I really want to be productive and work with people to reach a common goal. However, when I work with others I often get distracted by wanting to become friends with who ever I was working with.
You know when you are working in a group project and often end up hating those who can’t hold their weight in a project. It’s so easy to let professional feelings mess with personal feelings and vice versa. Just because a person isn’t your favorite doesn’t mean they aren’t good at their job.
Sometimes I feel like I take that mindset with me into my work life. I take on more work than is fair so people will like me more. It’s hard to find a balance between effectively doing my job and befriending those in my new job. It is a lot harder than I had initially anticipated. I want to balance my life, but being liked in my job is important cause you know politics and stuff.
Wish me luck.
Right now, life is weird. As anyone who has become an adult in the last 3-5 years at least that I know has worked multiple jobs. Now I know that I am incredibly lucky to have an foot in the field I want to work in. However, I am not making money. Over the past several months I have been working very hard to try get a second part time job to build skills and make some cash or build a safety net. I have been rejected immediately from EVERY SINGLE ONE.
Now let me tell you, I can now recognize the rejection as it is happening or from the first line of an email. It’s crushing every time, mostly because I do think I have the skills to do these jobs or can learn them. I am a fast learner! I am also always free my political job is flexible other than some events that I can alternate with my candidate for. So it’s frustrating.
I want to be productive and useful and right now I do not feel this way. I also do not feel as though I can spend any money which sometimes I need to do, like for birthdays and family travel and even just paying for gas. Although, I could consider it an internship or fellowship a learning experience. I am living at home and I just do not like feeling like a burden.
To cope, I am considering myself lucky to be working in the field I actually want to work in a cultivating a network of professionals in that field. Hopefully I am opening doors for myself in the future versus sticking myself in a hole or in one job. I am worried about money but luckily I am becoming an adult where there are other ways besides a traditional job to make cash. Also at this moment in time a lot of large retailers re closing. I try not to take it personally. There are a lot of people looking for jobs and very few places that can offer them. It is not personal.
Staying positive is hard, but I try.
Wish me luck.